Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:00:00]:
Today's installment is the fear of not doing it right. I'm gonna talk about what that Eakins. The fear of not doing it right. And I think this is gonna be really important because we're gonna touch on some pieces that might you might have experienced. You might have done something in the past. You you you made an attempt to, you know, make some change. You noticed that there are some issues out there. You went to to make some change or you went to step in and it didn't go well.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:00:28]:
Or or you might not have or feel as if you have the words, the right words to say to to intervene. So I understand that there's gonna be fear, and I've been a school principal. I've been in several leadership roles. I know sometimes when you have subordinates, sometimes when you have staff, when you have constituents regarding your department, regarding your school, regarding your district, It can be a challenge sometimes because of fear of whatever reasons. And so we'll be talking about that today. So make sure if you're not already subscribed to the channel, if you're not, hitting that bell, make sure you're doing that so that way you can keep up with each week as we move along. Alright. Today's agenda, social pressures.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:01:14]:
K. Social pressure, the fear in our hearts, and then we'll wrap things up with asking for a friend. I'm excited to bring to the to you today's content. I've been spending the week putting all the research together, putting those PowerPoint together, and so I'm excited to share this with you. Alright. Let's start with social pressure, the fear in our hearts. Now as a school leader, when we think about social pressures, k, what are some things that impact our decisions? Now if you've taken advantage of the free course that I have available on the website, leadandequitycenter.com, there's that implicit bias course there. And one of the things I talk about, we talk about 4 different biases, and one of those biases is the conformity bias.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:01:58]:
So if you are a school leader, what are the challenges that we could have as a school leader when it comes to the influence of social pressure is the conformity bias or the tendency to change one's beliefs or behavior to fit in with others. Example I like to give in this situation. Let's just say you're school principal. You're looking to maybe some new adopt a new school curriculum. Maybe it's, you're deciding, you know what? Do I want to promote maybe social emotional learning? Maybe do I wanna approach, universal design for learning or something else or some some sort of change that you're trying to implement, for example, and you had to and you're thinking, okay. How do I approach this? Because as leaders, we want folks to follow. And so we're like, okay. I know that this teacher is probably gonna give me a little bit of pushback.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:02:47]:
I know that this teacher probably is doesn't like change at all. You know, here's a brand new teacher. They're already Eakins of feeling overwhelmed. So you're we're we're assessing all these different variables with what it comes to what it's gonna take to implement this change and to get that buy in. Right? Now most leaders will know, okay, I probably can get 90%, but if I want a 100%, or I might can get 60% of my staff on board. But if I want to to to push those numbers a little bit higher, I need to get a certain staff member. Maybe it's an OG teacher. Maybe it's another individual who has a lot of pool.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:03:25]:
And so what I might do, and I've seen this before, where it's like you you call in that individual who has all this pool, who has a good reputation of other teachers, other staff members tend to follow them. And we're thinking from a political side of things. Right? That's sometimes how it is. And you you have a meeting with them, and they might tell you something like, okay. I can get the rest of the team on board. I can get just I can help you out with this. However, there's a a trip that I'm wanting to take. I wanna take some time off 3 weeks from now, or there's this other thing that I need, or or can you help me out in this area? Now you may not personally agree with this tactic.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:04:02]:
You might say, you know what? This doesn't feel right. However, you wanna get this process changed. You wanna get this system in place. You wanna put these new rules. You wanna do whatever it is that you're trying to accomplish. And so as a result, you go along with it. Or they might ask you to tweak something just a little bit again, but it might be something that you don't agree with. From another standpoint, maybe you are leading a staff meeting.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:04:23]:
And as you're leading the staff meeting, you're you're you're hearing stuff being said. Maybe some of your other teachers are saying some things or or other staff members are saying something that you don't agree with, but it seems like everybody is on board with this. But, again, it goes against what you know is right, or your own beliefs. And as a result, maybe a brand new principal. This is your 1st year in. You're just getting started, and you don't wanna ruffle the feathers too soon, and so you go along with it as opposed to really sticking to your guns or as my kids or as kids say these days, stand on business. Stand on business. Anyway, Alright.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:05:00]:
So you might you might go along with things again that go against you. That is the influence of social pressure. So as leaders, the influence of social pressure is real. Here's another example. Fear of conflict or confrontation. Let's go back to that example where you have this teacher who's prominent within your school. They have a lot of pool and you you butt hits a lot. Because again, they seem to have a good portion of your your team, your your staff on their side.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:05:29]:
So maybe this again, social pressure could influence your decisions because of you want to avoid any sort of controversial things. If I if I make this move, if I get rid of this practice, if I tell my team we're no longer accepting, I don't know, lesson plans, every other week, I want them every week or or there's something else that we're trying to change and we don't want the conflict. We know there's gonna be pushback. We're afraid of that pushback. So rather than making change or leading that change, which will benefit who? The students. Right? Benefit the students. But because we might be afraid of a community member or a parent or a staff member and how they're gonna respond, and we don't want to butt heads. We don't want that conflict.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:06:17]:
We don't want the smoke. We may not want the smoke. And as a result, that confrontation impacts our decisions. Another example, school school norms. I like to call this one, we've always done it this way. How many times you know that there's a tradition or practice? Maybe it's a chant. Maybe it's a spirit week thing that you do every year. Maybe it's something that happens at an out of school event.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:06:43]:
You know, every year we run this fall festival or you run this event, and you know it's wrong. You know it it isolates a certain group of people or or it makes fun of people. Folks, it's 2024. I'll say this real quick. It's 2024. If you still have a mascot, Native American mascot or Native American, you know, I hear and I where I live, there's a school called the savages. It it just breaks my heart. Racial slurs is your team, like, that's your team? In 2024, if there's practices, if there's, again, traditions, things that we do every year, this is what we do.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:07:19]:
And you know it's wrong. Like it's 2024. We need to make some change. However, you're afraid that I can't I I'm afraid to make these changes or lead these changes because of the pressure. Parents are gonna come up to me and say, you know what? I wore that Jersey. I had on a headdress when I was a kid. We need to keep the heritage. We need to keep the traditions going.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:07:42]:
Not that it's right or that it's wrong, but just well, that's what I did when I was younger. When I went to high school, I want my child to do that. I want my grandchild to experience those same traditions. Even though there might be cultural appropriation happening there. There might be some flat out racism happening within these practices. However, however, that social pressure is there. We could lead these changes. Again, this is all about creating a sense of belonging, whether if it's one child or group of children.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:08:11]:
If they feel as if they are not if they do not feel accepted, supported, or included within the environment, you will not have a sense of belonging. Those school norms make a difference. And then the last one here, personal beliefs, the convictions that may influence our decisions. I did an interview with brother Rudy L right around January 21st. Not January 21st. January 6 2021, I believe it was. And I remember one of the things he said stuck out to me. He said there might have been educators storming a capitol building.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:08:46]:
That was like it hit me hard because I I mean, he's right. Could have been school principals. Superintendents Sheldon all I know might have been out there January 6th. So imagine how those personal beliefs can impact what we want to do when it comes to change. I don't agree with that person's lifestyle or that that, you know, I I don't agree with how they paint their nails or the way that they dress. Has nothing to do with their academic or social emotional support. It's just strictly on what we believe. Oh, you know, I'm not gonna pay a lot of attention to that or I don't think it's, there's no sense of urgency because it goes against my morals and my beliefs.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:09:31]:
We do these type of things. It can lead to or perpetuate other things such as exclusion or the opposite. We always we've talked about this before. The opposite of exclusion is tokenism. What comes to my mind is the Atlanta cheating scandal. I want to say I just saw an article, who knows, a few months ago, where it seemed like they were still going on. The largest history criminal history or was it the largest I'm saying this wrong. The largest criminal case in Georgia's history was a cheating scandal.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:10:03]:
Why? Why was that cheating scandal there? Because of all the pressure for your students to perform well. You know, unfortunately, we see a lot of our schools get in put into, you know, academic support needed or probation. I wanna know. I don't know if it's academic probation, but it's, you know, they get into those those warnings where state might take over. And so there's that pressure of making sure that students test scores are high, and sometimes ethical and more moral decisions come into question, or the exclusion piece means might mean that, no, I got a gifted and talented program, or I have another program for academic excellence or scholarships that are available, but I only provide it to those certain groups of students. I only give to certain group students because I know they're gonna utilize this web. They they can handle it. And we don't talk to our teachers about, okay, you're teaching an honors class or you're teaching a dual enrollment class.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:11:01]:
Make sure that you're advertising this to everyone, not just tapping certain students on the shoulder and Eakins them or certain parents reaching out to them. I want John to take my class. I'm teaching dual enrollment. The exclusion can take place. I want my students to pass this honors class, so I'm just gonna ask certain folks. What's the opposite of that? Oh, when I look at my representation, I only have, you know, all all my kids seem to look the same, and I need to bring in that 1 or 2 to meet my quota of students for that token side. Right. So the opposite of exclusion is tokenism.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:11:36]:
Alright. Now the other part is there could be cultural insensitivity. Oh my god. Cultural insensitivity. The we always do it that way. We're gonna have a special party that we're gonna do. I don't know. Maybe Halloween party and what might happen in those Halloween parties, students come dressed up a certain way that might be offensive to other groups of folks.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:11:57]:
Or we just flat out could care less about what we're doing because, again, we've done it this way for years. This is our tradition. It may perpetuate cultural insensitivity. Then we got to think about a representation. Again, the good and the bad when it comes to representation. Representation, are our students, especially students who do not have, you know, the they're already not part of the dominant culture, and I know what it's like. And and my kids know what it's like when they're in a space where it's just them or handful of folks that share similar identity. Do they have a space for them to engage with one another and have conversations, such as maybe an affinity group? Are those available at your school? Doesn't mean that they're gangs.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:12:39]:
Doesn't mean that we're separating segregating further perpetuate. No. No. No. What we're doing is we're creating a space where student can have conversations, maybe even talk to an adult, talk to their peers about similar interest. I like to use the example. We have chess clubs. We have glee clubs.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:12:59]:
We have different clubs all the time, but as soon as you separated by personal identities, that's where we seem seem to have problems. Doesn't mean that I mean, there's so much research. Research that supports the benefits of having affinity groups. Also, we think about representation. You have over representation in special education versus your gifted and talented program. What about your school government? Do your students have are their voices amplified? Because they have a voice. But are we amplifying their voices? Or are we only saying, okay. You you guys can talk when I give you the opportunity to talk.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:13:38]:
Student government meetings are only available during lunchtime every other Monday. That's the only time I wanna hear you. I'll give you the end end of the semester. I'll we'll we'll let you present. Or the students have opportunities to engage with with their their staff their their teachers when they need to engage with their teachers. Now I always like to use caveats. Doesn't mean just have an open door policy at your school because you probably won't get no work done. So there there's there's still needs to be some boundaries, but we wanna make sure that we're getting student input.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:14:07]:
What what they feel, what they need in order for them to feel accepted, supported, and included. K. The next one is disproportionality. You see it a lot in our discipline practices. Look at your data. Who's getting kicked out of classrooms? Who's getting suspended? Who's getting expelled? These are just some of the things that social pressures can put forth. Let's move forward. The fear of not doing it right.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:14:29]:
Again, this goes back to those things that maybe it's a fear of saying the wrong thing. Maybe this is a boat that you can recognize or identify with saying the wrong thing. Oh, I don't wanna get accused of being sexist or misogynistic or racist or or whatever it is. I don't wanna say the wrong thing. The fear of offending each other or the fear of having to face that what we've been doing is not working for some of our kids facing that fact or facing the fact that those kids might be of color. It might be students who are learning a language. It could be students who are in poverty. It could be students who have special needs and coming to terms and realizing, you know what? I gotta look in the mirror and face the music, if you will, recognize, you know what? We've been doing this.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:15:19]:
That's been harming students for years, And we we say on our our handbook was right there on the wall, right when you walk into our hallway. We love all kids no matter what. But yet, some of our practices are negatively impacting certain groups of students. But in order for us to recognize these things, we have to be willing to have these conversations. The fear of saying the wrong thing and or offending each other, that's how we learn. But if we say, you know what? I made a mistake, and I I just never wanna make that mistake again. How will we grow? I found this article, or this research was done, where the question was raised to a group of students. How do we ensure that students of color feel, like, respected? And they asked several questions, and and what they found from their research was 5 things.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:16:06]:
Students felt respected when they received help when they were in need. Their boundaries were honored. They were appreciated, and their feelings, ideas, and perspectives were valued. And finally, their learning and growth was prioritized. It makes me remember right around George Floyd and COVID. It kinda happened around there. COVID and was happening, and then George Floyd happened. And I remember talking to a group of students about their high school experience.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:16:32]:
You know, this is towards the end of the school year, and I literally I can hear the kids saying this. We felt like our teachers just or our school just wanted us to finish the year. We didn't feel like our learning and growth was prioritized. Feel like this was just a time where folks were just trying to get us out. They were trying to finish the year, get us out for the summer so they can plan for next year because COVID happened. It just threw everything off in their in in their mind, and that's how the students L. But again, we will never know how they're really experiencing education unless we ask them, but if we're too afraid to get that feedback because kids will tell it like it is. They'll tell us.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:17:13]:
Nah, bro. That ain't it. I'm not happy. You know what? I think my teachers are not treating me fairly. I don't think that this tradition that we celebrate every October. I can't identify with this, or I I I'd like to sit with my friends and we tend to sit in the back of the cafeteria. But now we start to feel bad because our teacher always comes up to us and ask us, Why are you always sitting in the back? Why don't you come join everybody else? No, we don't want to. And I feel comfortable here.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:17:45]:
But now I feel pressured by my teachers to interact with folks, even though all day long. I'm in the same space where I feel like I'm always a odd person L. I just want 30 minutes during lunchtime to spend with someone that looks like me or share some similar identities. And now I'm feeling bad about doing that because my teachers are telling me, oh, why you always gotta do that? Or or they said it one time and then I every time they look at me, they they in the in the lunch room, they shake their heads. How does this make me feel as a student? But again, again, we'll never know these things. We don't ask these questions to our students. How will we get this feedback? But I digress. Let's talk about leading respectful communities.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:18:26]:
How can we do that? Alright. One way is model respect. When we model respect, our students see how we treat other students, how we treat our our our peers, the other teachers, the other staff members, community members, that the way we model that learned behavior, that social learning theory. When we start to model those type of things, our students pick up on that. They can tell if you're treating someone that looks a little different or someone that is not part of the dominant culture. They can tell if you're treating them differently. So we need to be making sure that we're communicating properly, that we're treating folks fairly and equitably in our approach. That should be what we're modeling to create that or shift that school culture.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:19:10]:
We also need to measure what matters. We talked about disproportionality, talked about representation. But again, how will you know that if you don't look at the data? Perform those climate surveys. In my book, I'll have a sense of belonging assessment instrument. It's something that school leaders can use. And again, it doesn't mean do it one time in the beginning of the school year. It needs to be reviewed often. The last piece I like to throw in there, if we're not doing this already, is restorative practices.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:19:37]:
This is a great opportunity for your students to sharpen their relationship and resolution Eakins. And not just a student, I think it's valuable for adults as well. K? But it creates that culture where folks, develop a level of respect that is beneficial to everyone. Those are just some ways that we could lead respectful communities. Alright. Asking for a friend. Maybe you can relate to this. Actual quotes from people that I've spoken to, educators that I've spoken to, or leaders that I've spoken to over the years.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:20:08]:
Here's the first one. I'm afraid to approach my friends or teachers of color for advice on engaging with black boys or supporting students from low income backgrounds. I worry that I might unintentionally offend someone or come across as ignorant. I don't have this identity and I recognize maybe they need some extra support or maybe there's some from an equitable standpoint, there's some areas that I need to focus on in order to relate or to engage students that might have various backgrounds that aren't like mine. But I'm afraid to ask someone who might share that background. So I'm afraid to ask my fellow black teachers or maybe I'm afraid to ask another student, another teacher or peer who has other identities that these students that I'm particularly trying to reach. Maybe English wasn't their first language. Now I want to ask them.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:21:03]:
Well, how do I how do I support them? What if I ask that question, what kind of repercussions may I face? Oh, I'm now being accused of this or being accused of that. I'm too afraid to engage in these conversations. So who ultimately gets negatively impacted? Those black boys, those low income students because you're afraid to ask the questions. However, okay, I'm gonna throw this out because this happened. Maybe you do share that identity and your thoughts is or maybe your demeanor is, well, it's not my responsibility to educate others to serve as the representative of my identity. You see the conflict there? You got one person that says, look. I recognize I need to support these students that have certain identities, but I'm afraid to ask because I don't want the answer of L not my responsibility and vice versa. Person says, well, it's not my response.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:21:58]:
You need to figure that out on your own and you can see how this can detrimentally impact our students. The ones who need to be discussed. The ones who need these questions asked. The questions aren't answered as a result who misses out is the Eakins. K. I get it. I completely understand how this here, This scenario here can be a challenge. Now, me personally identify as a black male and I have learned over the years that you because I had to say my accent.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:22:27]:
Well, it's not my, it's not on me. You No. I why should I have to educate folks? And I still have that identity from a or mindset rather, but it comes from don't let me be the only person or the only information that you're getting. That makes sense. So for example, I can give you my opinion. I can tell you how I feel as a, you know, when I was a black boy growing up in school, and this is what helped me, but it doesn't necessarily mean that that's the way to go. That's the only thing. Doctor.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:22:59]:
Gloria Ladson Billings did a lot of research on black boys. For example, culturally responsive teaching came from that work. Pick up one of her books, pick up other books, do your own research, and the thing that you have to do if you do want to speak to a colleague is not make those assumptions that all your colleagues that have that same identity have these have have Sheldon know the answer to it. Simple question you can always ask is, has this been your experience? Let's say I'm wanting to go up to again, let's say I'm I'm having some challenges with reaching my black boys in my classroom, and I have a black teacher, black male teacher in a building. I go up to him and say, hey. These are some of the challenges that I'm experiencing. What do you think I should do? Versus has this been your experience? Or what was it like for you as an educator? What what helped you? You know. And then again, don't let that be your only answer, but also follow-up and get additional support from reading books, other resources, maybe try some things out.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:24:00]:
Maybe ask parents. Maybe ask those black boys what would support them. How what what can I what do you like in my class? What are some things you like? What are, you know, ask those questions. But again, you will not get any progress if we don't ask. And I always encourage my my educators out there who do have these lived experience. One thing to do. I know that it's easy to have the mindset of, well, it's not my responsibility, and I and I totally understand. But I would like to see if we can look at it from a different perspective rather than thinking it's not my responsibility to educate others or serve as a representative of my identity.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:24:35]:
Again, I'm a person who black man that lives in Idaho, so I'm feeling that way all the time. But then also, I I have learned that a lot of people genuinely don't know. They're just ignorant. They have absolutely no idea. And so if I can be a touch point that can support them in in their efforts because they're genuine. A lot of times people genuinely don't know, and they're just asking because asking for a friend. Right? They want to know. I say, hey, this is my take.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:25:01]:
This is what I think. I don't represent my whole entire race, but this is what I believe. This is what helped me. But I also suggest that you go look into this person's book or look at this research. It might further support or enhance your needs. I love this quote here. The man who asked a question is a full 4 minute. The man who does not ask is a full for life.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:25:25]:
Isn't this better to ask the question to get that knowledge? And, yeah, in that moment, you might feel a little foolish. Look. I hate to ask, but I'm just curious. But when you don't ask and you remain silent, guess what? You'll never know. Think about that first part. The man who asked a question is a full 4 minute. That feeling is temporary. You're full for like, you don't know.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:25:46]:
You're ignorant for just a moment. Asking that question helps you learn and grow. The second part of that quote, the man who does not ask is a fool for life. Guess what? When you don't ask, you don't seek that knowledge, you will never know. It lasts forever. You gotta seek clarification. Ask for understanding. You can't be afraid to do that because you're afraid of offending or hurting someone else.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:26:10]:
Rather than making those assumptions and just operating off of assumptions, ask the questions. I think this quote encourages one's curiosity. It also puts you in a very humble and often vulnerable state, but you are willing to learn. At the end of the day, it's better to risk just a moment of embarrassment by asking these questions rather than to remain ignorant forever. Because at the end of the day, when we don't ask these questions, we can go to all the PDs we want. We can go to equity PDs and go to diversity, equity, inclusion PDs. We can do all the work. We can read a bunch of books.

Dr. Sheldon Eakins [00:26:45]:
We can do all these things. But if we're not having these conversations, if we're not engaged in communicating with one another, then our students are gonna negatively be impacted and sense of belonging is not gonna be there. We talk about this all like we have to talk about these things. Social pressure, I know is real. It's a big deal. However, we have to be willing to engage in these conversations and ask these questions. Fear of not doing it right has to go away.

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